DoorToDecember

sick of being this way. you never realized how obsessed i was with you. still am. it never changed, but you never knew the depth. just because i'm quiet doesnt mean anyless, it ment more. to concerned to make a mistake in your presence, confused with emotions that wouldn't stop falling from the sky. couldn't consider what it was we each wanted. just pressing with all hope, then collapsing for nothing. long hours spent, thinking of only you. mental beatings  gave all thoughts the innocence of virtue. now in the dark, i will confess, i wanted more then just friend, i wanted you to touch you thoughts  and not pull away, to know what brings you

 -Christmas eve, 2005 Never any different is it. You can go far away to something you thought you wanted and realize you left itbehind. and sure why not, we're only human....we make that mistake. So what do you want to dream f tonight as the infantile fantasy jolly man in a red coat is supposed to drive his randeer acroos the night sky? Of the morning. Why? its another day. not a big deal. why must we choose one day singurlarly out of the year to share this much joy with others. or are we unable to really accomplish this more then that in 365 days. oh well... i wish it was overwith, becasue i left the only thing i love somewhere in a shi

Live as if im already dead. Die as if i never lived Doesnt sound so nice on paper.